HEENA GUGNANI • FEMALE • 37 • HARYANA
Hi, I am Heena Gugnani.
And today I want to talk about the symptoms of post-partum depression I saw in myself after delivering my premature baby.
For a while, it felt like this happens with every mother who delivers the baby in an emergency situation. Everything will be alright.
But no, that did not happen. In spite of having all the love and support of my husband, family and friends, I was not able to cope up. Somehow it felt like I was going into a dark space.
That feeling of irritability, those anger issues, I don’t know from where they came and make their space in my head. That crankiness, hopelessness about life.
What will I do in future? How will I take care of my child? Those mood swings, I don’t know how to handle. The things which I used to love, now I’m losing interest in them.
Whenever my husband used to ask me, let’s go out, let’s go out for dinner, for shopping, anywhere. I used to deny that. No, I don’t have the energy because I used to feel tired after doing those domestic chores and taking care of baby.
I was not able to do anything else. I wanted to live alone, but I deep inside I want someone to help me. But somehow I was not able to put it out.
One day, my husband saw this frustration. He called me up and said that, sit here. What is troubling you? Then I put my heart out like all. There and then he said, Heena, you are a psychology enthusiast. How can you suffer so much?
Don’t go into this darkness. I am with you. Come out of it. Take help. Don’t bother yourself so much.
The longer we run it, the deeper the symptoms will get and we won’t even know when you’ll get into actual depression. So, there and then, me and my husband that we need to bring back that confident girl which was like a pro in things and now not able to do any single task outside her home without the help of her husband.
He started planning things for me. He started sending me to the grocery stores to buy stuff and waiting for me outside. He started planning me time for me. The things which I used to love to do alone like walk, study, self care, started enjoying them slowly.
It was tough, it took time but I was feeling that I’m coming out. Slowly, slowly, I felt that I can come out of this darkness. I don’t need to lose myself in it.
I enrol in some courses just to keep myself busy and doing something which is of my interest. The girl who was so passionate about her field started feeling that – okay – this is something which can help me come out. Then slowly, I started working on those things.
Then slowly I started working on those things. I improved my skill and I restarted my journey in 2002 November and Now I’m practicing as a counseling psychologist, and I’m very happy to tell that Though I was not able to recognize those symptoms, but my husband did thankfully and now I can see he just took me out of that darkness.
Those who are watching this, I urge you to recognize those symptoms in everyone around you Those who are suffering, they will not say, they will not say anything. You have to recognize them and become a help for them. Take them to a mental health professional or Slowly remind them those things that they used to do before.
To know more about Heena, visit her instagram handle – @optimistic_heena
